Cross the line

Oh, what could be more bizarre
Than forming your truth out of a scar,
And training your mind to colour your view
While you secretly hope to claim life anew.

"It's easier said than done", they say,
But if you look at it a different way,
The urge to define yourself
Binds you to a logical conclusion.

A beautiful equation with undeniable proofs.
And truths, you speak
And claim to know
For all the years you've been on the show.

I've grown to admire the 'may be'
It's freshness and simplicity take me
Into a brighter, lighter version
Of the truths, and the manifold conclusions.

But yes, sometimes the freshness scares me,
And I feel the need to belong
To that typical, logical version of me.
Then I sing your silly song.

Today, the pendulum has swung back the other way
And I must admit, I choose to stay
For a while longer with the 'may be' this time.
Would you also like to cross the line?

Love and Detach

It started too early, and took you by storm,
My quest for myself, and the breaking of norms.
You knew who I was, and felt I could not sustain,
But my heart was committed to the leap and flames.

And so began our journey of love, and hate
Nothing you said or did could work as bait
To steer me away from the battle inside.
The more you questioned, the more I would hide.

I sometimes try and imagine the hurt you must feel
To know that I am not that version of me
Who came into your arms without a moment of doubt
And bathed in your love before and after each bout.

You doubt that your love is not enough anymore,
That I may have swum too far from the shore.
You feel that I am gasping for breath in the tides,
You don't see me enough to comfort your eyes.

And that, my dear mother, is where your challenge lies,
To trust that you have raised me well enough to battle the knives.
I may appear tired, wounded and sore,
But there is a lot of your love left in store.

Yes, love and detach is your motto from now,
As you move forward to your place in the clouds.
And then, when I join you, you will finally see,
The innocent child, that is your version of me.

To My Most Faithful Friend

Oh horrid little mind of mine!
My strongest foe, yet a friend so fine,
Keeping me alive with everything breath I take.
Let's talk now, it is not too late.

To hate you is to hate myself, of this I am aware.
But how often can I quietly obey and agree with all your swears?
You make me judge, you make me fear, you keep me out of harm's way.
But stop sometime, and think, if I really should paint everything the same way.

I am who I am because of you,
And my gratitude knows no bound.
But there is a voice calling out to me,
So I need you to quiet down.

There seems to be another part of me,
Pure, still and so serene.
It sings sweet songs and whispers to my heart,
"I am your love, unseen"

I have heard a similar tone before,
When I would play in my mother's arms.
It was in my chuckles, my screams and my giggles,
And would bring everyone joy abound.

May be you and I can listen to that voice again,
And fill ourselves with the love you know I possess.
And then, with the wisdom you have gained so far,
We can choose when to live more, and when to live less

Sometimes, it's me. Sometimes, it's you.

Not one step more, not one step less.

Stay there, don't come closer. At least not yet.

I may not like where I am right now,

But I feel closer to myself.

Gluing it together, with all the love I possess.

Or may be it is a version I can control.

My mind wanders all over my heart, as if on patrol.

Stay there, just please stay there right now.

I know you are with me, I have no doubt,

But the smallest of things throw me off nowadays.

I know I have the courage, but I wish I had the grace.

So let me control how I should react.

I do love you, you should know that

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My love, for you I will find patience abound.

You make me go deeper, and truly feel the ground,

While most other lovers make each other fly in the air.

I guess we are different, but I really don't care,

Even though our search for truth sometimes makes us feel bare.

I get a sense of what you feel right now,

I wish I could make it lighter, but I don't know how.

I wish I could show you the version of myself,

That leaves the result to destiny, and finds peace in himself.

I feel I must strive to become that version of me,

So that you can see for yourself, what it means to be truly free.

A Tale of Two Twisted Warriors

They walked into the arena, head high and scars galore

They thought to themselves

‘This can’t hurt me more than I’ve been hurt before’

They were products of providence, Hercules in their own right.

Each had been through battles, and knew what it took to fight.

She was a street hustler, smart, gritty and ruthless

He looked to be a peaceful samurai, but could endure the worst from the best

She laughed at his timid nature, and wondered if he could last one round

He smiled gently at her, and put his feet firmly on the ground.

She danced around in circles, throwing jabs left and right

He seemed too slow for her, and couldn’t avoid the bite.

The questions, long and winding, looked to throw him off the ring

But him stumbling, didn’t give her the satisfaction she thought it would bring

Every time he found his feet, her hardened heart found a second beat

This dual was not an ordinary one, she felt

Something about him made the ice melt

She got a sense of what this was, and pondered whether to pursue the cause

But he knew, without a doubt, what he was up against

The blows had shattered his pretense

And instead of feeling hurt and cold, he felt the warmth of her burning soul

Yes, this dual was not an ordinary one

But let’s not make it too serious, I say

Let us try and lighten the load today

I’ll change the tone to honor the promise I made

And try to make this a humorous escapade

As the two continued their path that night,

They oscillated between what some would call a dance, others a fight

Some from the crowd that had gathered around them, said,

‘The war may be over, but not for them. Not yet’

The fighters made a fool of themselves that day

And the closer they got, the more they strayed

Did they know that they were not meant to fight each other?

That their blows had been reduced to kisses and love letters?

What a sham of a fighting match it was

That had turned hardened warriors to lovers, lost!

But the wiser lot in the crowd did say,
'They found themselves in each other, that day'

Us

A sound, true at its core, yet unbelievable.

Bound to it's own fragile roots,

It gently floats into an unsettled life.

Redemption and relief seem closer now, 

I can now see light - a small flame,

Lighting up the dark alley,
Paving the way to a brighter future.

Hold up your end, and I'll hold up mine
Let's keep the boat afloat in these delicate times.
For what I see in you is something I've rarely seen before.
A generous spirit - strong and pure.

We are only the result of what we nurture, you see.
So, this time, let us try to look at things differently.
May be the world really isn't that shrewd.
May be it is just reacting to us and our cynical view.

When we stopped and wondered for too long,
We let go of the chance to sing a song.
We forgot, that that song wasn't really ours to keep.
It was meant for a lot more than you and me.

And in that thought is where we lie,
Where the 'us' is meant to create a beautiful sky.
And that is why I cherish you more and more.
You look a lot like the person my soul was looking for.

There may be a lot left for us to see,
And we will have our share of ploys played by destiny.
And for that, I pray, more than I have ever done before,
That we are guided to find our very own shore.

The Transporter

Make me an instrument of your will, he said. Because no other role could cleanse my wounds and clean my heart enough for you to reside in it.

But while you grace me with this task, remember the frailty of my flesh. I will forget where I have come from, and will not know where I have to go. I will not be able to the tell the light from darkness, and will fall into the traps along the way. I will fail, and rise, and fall, and lose all hope. My mind will become heavy, and my heart will be sore.

You will want me to carry them from where they are, to where they need to go. And you will make me do this, even if it hurts along the way. And I will curse you, and cry foul, and blame you for not being on my side. But in this injustice, you will teach me justice. And by being unmerciful, you will teach me mercy.

And when I finally reach my destination, you will show to me that I was not carrying them.

Instead, you were carrying me.